Episode 64: How to Potpourri

We're back with another suggestions episode! We taught a lot, we learned a lot, and we're excited to pass that knowledge on. You want one for free? Check out the title of the episode. Now you know how to spell "Potpourri". We had to google it. ENJOY! And if you have any "how to" suggestions, hit us up at downtimesubs@gmail.com!

Thanks to our musical guest Circle of Reason with their song Questions! You can check out the music video for Questions and more at youtube.com/circleofreasonband!

Intro/Outtro Theme: Ethan Gustavson ethangustavson.com

Cover Art: Natalie Spitzel nataliespitzel.com

Episode 63: How to Love Thy Mother

Mother's Day is coming up next week and John and Emily are here to help you figure out what the hell you can do for her. Featuring our brother Kit giving away exactly what time it is, our new Mom who is a registered nurse but also afraid of needles, serious mob threats, and much more!

Check out Las Grasas Trans right here! lasgrasastrans.bandcamp.com  

Intro/Outtro music by Ethan Gustavson ethangustavson.com

Cover Art by Natalie Spitzel nataliespitzel.com

Episode 62: How to Propose

The beginning of this episode is...oddly medical? 

In this episode, John and Emily focus on that most central of themes: Love. They love love. Who doesn't? John and Emily want to help you put your best foot forward when it comes time to tell your parter to go ahead and marry you already. Mentions include complicated living structures, convoluted family cons, and the time-honored tradition of proposing by drone. So tune in and make sure to listen all the way through for some exciting news!

Music this week is provided by The Deadly Unrest with their song, Just a Song! Links will be posted as soon as we have social media for this hot new album! 

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 61: How to Make Money

WARNING: ALL OF THE IDEAS DISCUSSED IN THIS PODCAST ARE THE PROPERTY OF JOHN AND EMILY. 

Wowsers! Emily and John went a little crazy on this one. They talk clever marketing strategies, the runaway train that is their brainstorming process (featuring actual background trains), cryptocurrency, and the American institution Chuck E. Cheese. They also want to apologize to their most loyal listener for those sick burns. (We love you, Mom.) 

The musical guest this week is the awesomely named Earth Dad with their song, Geek! To hear more from Earth Dad, please go to www.soundcloud.com/earth_dad.

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com.

Podcast art by Natalie Spitzel. To see more from Natalie, please go to nataliespitzel.com. 

Episode 60: How to Touch a Bug

Trigger Warning! John and Emily talk about bugs in this. Allll kinds of creepy crawlies. Turns out, Emily knows a bit about bugs and she and John want the world to know the magic of the insect kingdom. Bugs are pretty neat! But, if you don't like hearing about our multi-legged friends, then this ep may not be your fave. Tune in to learn something new, and to gain new respect for the creatures that outnumber humans by the billions!

Music this week is Trouble by The Long Way! To hear their new album The Best We Had, please go to https://open.spotify.com/artist/1ORQ3TJbj9K6HRHCewV2bT?si=8kBP89yVQ_m4imxjBK11ww 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com

Episode 59: How to Make Sushi

Wow, John and Em get to a lot in this one. They talk Terrace House and Bake Off, Pawleys Island night life, and Emily surprises John by actually knowing a thing. 

Very special thanks to Fun Button with their song, Honey Truck! To hear more from Fun Button, please go to https://funbutton.bandcamp.com/

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com

Episode 58: How to Drive a Car

We're late! But we're burning rubber to get you this fresh hot episode on wheels! And it's a certified hotrod! 

Ok. John and Emily don't know much about cars. But they're gonna do their darndest to teach you everything you need to know before getting behind the wheel. So listen up, and please please please don't drink and drive. 

Our musical submission this week is Special by Angie Capone and the Vibes! Angie is the person behind the annual "Rock the Ribbon" festival in Myrtle Beach, SC that benefits local breast cancer patients. To find out more about Angie, the Vibes, and Rock the Ribbon, please go to https://www.facebook.com/RTR4U/ 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 57: How to Go Green

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

John and Emily are celebrating this extra-ass holiday by going green! In this episode they talk dismantling capitalism, Emily's cat (no surprises there), the history of St. Patrick's Day, and Kermit the Frog!

The musical guest this week is Austin Reed Alleman with his song, Til the End! To hear more from Austin, please go to www.austinreedalleman.com. 

INtro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please visit ethangustavson.com. 

Special thanks to Natalie Spitzel for our new cover art!To commission Natalie, please go to www.nataliespitzel.com. 

Episode 56: How to Cry

Feeling sad? Weepy? A little numb? Cry about it!

No, seriously. We want you to cry. Maybe tears of laughter, maybe real Oscar-worthy sobs. John and Emily are sharing the best ways to let it alllll out. They're talking babies, punching your friends and the best movies and music to bawl to. 

Special thanks to Tom Saguto with his song, Mr. Reject! To hear more from Tom, please go to www.tomsrockinguitar.com. 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com

Episode 55: How to Pick a Place to Eat

We've all been there. You're chillin' with your S.O., your coworkers, or your buddies and you get into that dreaded back and forth.

"Where do you wanna go to eat?"

"I don't know, where do you wanna eat?"

That thing. Well those days are finally over because John and Emily have developed a patented comprehensive system for choosing where you should go out to eat. They're talking restaurant antics, Witches vs Werewolves, John's hatred of Yelp and Emily's undying love for Padma Lakshmi. Sponsored by Ganso Ramen and Delta Airlines*. 

Musical guest this week is Avery Florence with her song, Heavenly! To hear more from Avery, please go to https://open.spotify.com/artist/15PYbG7pGisbMdo344dtfr. 

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com.

*Please don't sue us we have no money

Episode 54: How to Take a Nap

Wake up! It's time to learn how to siesta like a pro with John and Emily!

This week John and Em are taking the fast lane to snoozeville with pit stops in whatever conversation town that suits their fancy...s. They're talkin' Game of Thrones spoilers, John's latest Netflix binge session, the Adventures of Oscar the Cat and much, much more! Guaranteed to cure insomnia or your money back! 

Our musical guest this week is Nicolas Pirillo (Also known as BOXI TRIXI) with his song Aventura Interior! If you would like to hear more from Nicolas, please go to https://soundcloud.com/boxitrixi. 

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. If you would like to hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 53: How to Make a Sacrifice

Wow this week was a real doozy. Did you take your sweetheart out to a nice dinner? Did you get smashed for Carnival? Are you ready to give up something you love for Lent? There's a lot of stuff goin' on!

This week John and Emily are reminiscing about their Catholic school days and teaching you how to give something up! Get ready for a sacrilegious roller coaster ride! The Downeys are also tackling the Wonders of Super Food Town, RuPaul's Drag Race, National Treasure, and how John became a fashion icon and inspired the nation. 

Our music this week is provided by the fabulous Annie McLean with her son Cryptic! To hear more from Annie, please go to anniemclean.bandcamp.com!

Intro/Outtro theme provided by Ethan Gustavson. If you would like to hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 52: How to Shave Your Legs

Want to know the secret to silky-smooth legs? Need to hear a semi-graphic account of John's first time ever shaving? Want to learn how to say no to hair-related peer pressure? Well this is the show for you!

Now, it must be noted that sometimes, we here at Downtime really try. And sometimes those efforts end up disappearing into the technological ether. So please enjoy the rehashing of our "How to Shave Your Legs" recording mishap (courtesy of Emily), and look forward to some sweet bonus material involving actual footage of John shaving his legs while sitting on a bathroom with two of his closest friends! (Available on www.patreon.com/downtime) 

Our musical guest this week is the sickeningly talented Danielle Grubb with her song, Undone! To hear more from Danielle, please go to http://soundcloud.com/daniellegrubb. 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 51: How to Live Forever

Are you ready to experience eternity?

Hi there, and welcome to Downtime with John and Emily, where we make the impossible sound even dumber. In this episode, the Downeys teach you How To Live Forever. Learn the secrets of eternity like the great elders before you. Jimmy Buffett, Ellen DeGeneres, and a small boy dressed as Zorro walking around the streets of Buenos Aires. You can be just like them.

The musical guest for this episode is Saint-Smith & Rexach with their song Don't Mess (with a man). To hear more from Saint-Smith and Rexach, check out https://soundcloud.com/saintsmithrexach. 

Intro/Outtro Theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 50: How To Do a Flip

This week, John and Emily are taking it to the max with user-submitted How to Do a Flip! 

John gets passionate about safety, Emily makes a scientific discovery, and John and Emily reveal their first ever Listener of the Month! 

The musical guest this week is Deaf Dogs with their new single For Gold! For more from Deaf Dogs, please go to https://soundcloud.com/cameron-christensen 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

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Episode 49: How to be the World's Greatest Dad

Did you know that Genghis Khan was a great golfer? Well, here at Downtime with John and Emily, we strive to provide our listeners with only the most factual and carefully researched information. Because we're just that great. 

In this episode, we're showing you How to be the World's Greatest Dad because we want you to be prepared for dadhood at any given time. It could happen. At. Any. Time. So settle in and give it a listen! We promise you won't regret it. 

Music this week is provided by the Buenos Aires-based Sahara Wanderer Sound Experiment with their song Quema Buenos Aires! For more from the Sahara Wanderer Sound Experiment, please go to http://andewanderer.com/ or https://m.soundcloud.com/a-wanderer-767695419.

Intro/Outtro them by Ethan Gustavson. For more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com

Wear condoms, kids! 

Episode 48: How to Come Down from the Holidays

John and Emily are back just in time for a final episode of 2017! Folks, it's been a year. But we've got 2018 in our sights and we're not looking back. 

This week, John and Emily are talking Christmas guests, substandard host plumbing, holiday hangovers, and what to do with those pesky leftovers. Also, half of this episode is recorded in Sam's car. It happens. But, you can hear that John puts his seatbelt on, so you know he's safe. Enjoy the last holiday themed episode of the season, and have a spectacular New Year!

Music this week is Rebecca Haviland and Whiskey Heart with their song 'How Can I' off the album Melodies4Water, a nonprofit collaboration album done to raise awareness about the global water crisis. As a part of our holiday theme this month, we have decided to feature one song from this album each week for the entire month of December, in order to aid the artists in their goal to raise funds for a water filtration system in the town of Chiapas, Mexico. Please go to melodies4water.bandcamp.com to support the cause, and hear more from Rebecca Haviland and Whiskey Hart at rebeccahaviland.com. 

Intro/Outtro theme by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com. 

Episode 47: How to Deck the Halls

Are you ready for Round Two of our Month-Long Holiday Extravaganza?! WELL, TOO BAD, HERE IT COMES! Today Emily and John are talking about Holiday decorating. Some decorating tips for you: Sustainability is key, Mistletoe and Holly are different, Smooches should be constant and everywhere.

Thank you to Hannah Lee Thomson for her song Please Be Patient with Me! Check her out at instagram.com/banjohannah and make sure to hit that follow button! Please Be Patient with Me is off the album Melodies 4 Water which is a benefit project to raise awareness of the water crisis crippling our world right now. Show your support by going to melodies4water.bandcamp.com for info and to buy the album to support the cause! 

Intro/Outtro by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com

Episode 46: How to Start a Holiday Tradition

Ho ho ho!

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year once more, and John and Emily are going international with their Winter Solstice Celebrations in How to Start a Holiday Tradition! They're digging deep into pagan rituals, multi-cultural secular events, Starbucks coffee, and something called a Caga Tió for inspiration in order to create a holiday tradition that is uniquely Downtime. 

Our musical guest this week is Leah Woods with her song ‘Fork Island.’ This song is off the album Melodies 4 Water, a nonprofit collaboration album done to raise awareness about the global water crisis. As a part of our holiday theme this month, we have decided to feature one song from this album each week for the entire month of December, in order to aid the artists in their goal to raise funds for a water filtration system in the town of Chiapas, Mexico. For more information or to donate, please go to https://melodies4water.bandcamp.com/ and to hear more from Leah you can got to https://www.leahwoodsmusic.com/ 

Episode 45: How to Gobble Gobble (A Thanksgiving Special)

This week, Emily and John are teaching you how to do Thanksgiving RIGHT. We're answering a whole bunch of Thanksgiving How-To's, and havin fun along the way!
This week's musical submission is non other than Mason McDowell's song Sergeant Stone featuring John Downey!!! To hear more from Mason, please go to masonmcdowell.bandcamp.com.
Intro/Outtro by Ethan Gustavson. To hear more from Ethan, please go to ethangustavson.com.